Molly

Molly. She is a reminder that God loves me like that!

So, I will be the first to admit, I am not a morning person.
Just. not.
I crave good sleep and never get it. (thanks, Insomnia :P)
So, I am always really sleepy in the morning.
This morning...has been different.

Driving back from taking the boys to school...I put in a music cd that a friend of mine recently released.

I listened to the first few songs...wow, good lyrics, Anthony!
Then, the song entitled, Dance With Me, came on.

My hands are shaking like a leaf,
My mind is racing, Lord, it wont sleep.
It's just been so long since Ive felt my heart beat,
So I need You, Lord to sing over me....

chorus
"Ive heard it said You're all I need, and here in Your arms is where Im complete, So I need the Calmer of Storms to calm my raging sea, So wont You come and dance with me...So wont You come and dance with me"

Now I can feel the weights fall apart
Now I can hear my beating heart
Cause, this was Your plan right from the start..to be where we are...

chorus
"Ive heard it said You're all I need, and here in Your arms is where Im complete, So I need the Calmer of Storms to calm my raging sea, So wont You come and dance with me...So wont You come and dance with me"

As You take me hand -in- hand,
Alone on the sand and you walk with me.
Its there I can finally see,
Who I'm meant to be
As we dance forevermore.

chorus
"Ive heard it said You're all I need, and here in Your arms is where Im complete, So I need the Calmer of Storms to calm my raging sea, So wont You come and dance with me...So wont You come and dance with me"

Instantly, I felt close to God.
Just calmly in my mini van...I could relate with this singer...and I thought... "Hey, I have been there...wait a minute...I am there NOW".

This song took my racing mind to the scripture in Zephaniah 3:17 - (NKJV)

17 The LORD your God in your midst,
The Mighty One, will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.”

And this morning, right in this girls mini-van, HE did just that.


As I got home, I went out and watered my flowers. I. love. flowers.
They looked as sleepy as I felt.
Some of their blooms were relunctant to face the morning sun....
But, they will bloom today.
It is their job.
It is my job to do the same.

Thank You Lord, for coming near to me this morning.
Order my steps today to share Your love.
Bless me today and let me see the way You love me.
Thank You for my life and another day to see Your goodness.
It blows my mind that You, the Creator of this world, would dance and sing over me.
But. You. Do.
I am grateful.
~Amen

Check out Anthony Mossburg's cd, The Rambler!!!!

It occurred to me this morning
as I washed this face of mine,
How quickly come the changes
with a little passing time
A wrinkle here, a hair turned gray
a not so lilting step
I see me growing older,
but i don't quite feel it yet
At times I nearly feel my age
at others I'm, sixteen,
So full am I of all the thoughts
and feelings in between

Who would have thought the road of life
Would twist and turn so much?
The journey makes me strong and weak and
tender to the touch.
And so this day I face the choice
that I have faced each day,
Will I be open? Teachable?
Unafraid of change?
Yes.

I will embrace this moment.
Forgive my past mistakes.
And remember that just showing up is
sometimes all it takes.
I'll seek the kind of beauty
that time cannot erase,
Wisdom and experience resting on my face.

~Amy Grant

Please read this...it is good. I got it today and read it right away just so I could have some quiet time. I am trying to do that each day now....cause I NEED IT SO! The follow devo reminds me to suck it up and be grateful. God wants to bless me....and I dont want to miss out on it because my attitude stinks. We are blessed for so many reasons in life. BUT, if we ONLY had HIM, that would be more than enough.
Im thankful for YOU God...and Im grateful for the extras that you have given to this girl. :) You are so good.

Here is the devo:


Giving Thanks

"And the LORD spoke to Moses and to Aaron, saying, 'How long shall this wicked congregation grumble against me? I have heard the grumblings of the people of Israel, which they grumble against me. Say to them, 'As I live, declares the LORD, what you have said in my hearing I will do to you: your dead bodies shall fall in this wilderness, and all of your number, listed in the census from twenty years old and upward, who have grumbled against me, not one shall come into the land where I swore that I will make you dwell, except Caleb the son of Jephunneh and Joshua the son of Nun. But your little ones, who you said would become a prey, I will bring in, and they shall know the land that you have rejected.' ' " - Numbers 14:26-31

Life is all about choices.

Attitude is our first one. When I encounter a situation that is not what I think it should be, I must choose to see it like the proverbial glass half-full or the glass half- empty. Those two perspectives take me to two very different places depending on my attitude.

God cares very much about our choice between a negative attitude full of complaining and a grateful attitude full of faith. Apart from the Cross of Christ itself, I believe the most radical thing that He ever did in Scripture is in Numbers 14 where He said to a whole generation of His own children, "I can't take your grumbling anymore. Go on back into the wilderness and die." He loved these people; He miraculously and dramatically rescued them. But no matter what He did for them, they flat-out refused to stop their chorus of whining.

So, God decided to give their kids the blessing that they wouldn't let Him give to them. All because they refused to look at their situation with a grateful attitude. Very simply, God would have been pleased if they had listed all the ways He had protected and cared for them and then shouted a heart-felt, "Thank You, Lord." Their gratitude would have changed history.
Even pagans see the impact of a thankful attitude. Tune in to the talk show circuit and you'll hear this same word on the top of everyone's list on how to have a better life. A God-centered, faith-oriented, grateful life is a healthier, happier life—this from people who don't even know the Lord. Just imagine the joy available for those of us who are His own.

Yes, joy flows when you stop harping on the present, perhaps difficult circumstances and turn your attention to the blessings that are yours in Christ Jesus. How? Start by giving thanks for all that you have received from Him. Be personal and specific, rehearsing His faithfulness from big things to small. Like a fragrant offering, your gratitude rises to God and blesses Him and in turn, His blessing fills you with such faith that the pattern of your life turns from complaining to thankfulness.

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Discipline

Reading. I want to love it...but I dont. I am so easily distracted that by the end of the paragraph, I have no idea what I have read and I have recited my To Do list in my head. UHHHH! I hate this fact. The funny thing is that I LOVE BOOKS. I love to buy books. I love their concepts. I love all the work put into them. I love the encouragement they give. The places they take me....I just cannot focus well and soon give up on the reading.

So....I dont like it...so I dont do it! Makes no sense. The desire is there. The admiration of the piece of art that a book is to me...is there....but I lack in motivation.

This is where DISCIPLINE is coming into my life right now.
Basically, I am beginning to make myself do the things that I dont FEEL like doing...but know those things are good for me and will enrich my life. Reading His word, eating better, exercise, quality time with my husband and kids, blogging, just things that are good....things I need....but are NOT demanded like the rest of life.

I want MORE of God.
I want to be closer to my Sweet Husband.
I want to enjoy my boys.
I want to be healthy.
I want to have self control when there is cake and icing in the house.
I want to journal and blog to encourage others around me.
No one demands these things......I think it is time for me to step up and demand them!

Clutter

I think the clutter is reproducing in my house. How do we get so much stuff? I have stored stuff in the places that I need to put current stuff away. It is overwhelming. I get to a point to where I want to just sleep and not think about it. It almost depresses me. Maybe it actually does a little? It is not dirt....it is stuff. Some neatly stacked....some shoved unto cabinets and closets so tightly that I have to quickly close the door so it all stays in. Ok....my goal - beginning today is to clean one closet, cabinet or drawer a day for a while. We will see how I do.

Today is the hall closet.

Wish me luck.

Better

I want to be a better: mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend....a better Angie.
I think I will start today.

I Feel Like Im Losin' - Tenth Avenue North

I love to listen to Tenth Avenue North. It is a band that I admire. Everytime a cd comes out....I buy it and listen to it while reading each word on the cd cover. God speaks through this band. Had to share this new song....it's not even on a cd yet but it was shared on their web site. I heard it for the first time last night, listened to it like 20 times in a row...Honest, deep words. Good stuff! Forgiveness is key in our lives - period!


FEELS LIKE I’M LOSING – Tenth Avenue North
http://totalaxxess.typepad.com/total_axxess/2010/08/exclusive-debut-of-tenth-avenue-norths-song-losing.html

I cant believe what she said
I cant believe what he did
Don’t they know it’s wrong
Don’t they know it’s wrong
Well maybe there’s something I missed
But how could they treat me like this
It’s wearing out my heart
The way they disregard

This is love or this is hate…
We all have a choice to make

Oh, Father wont You forgive them
They don’t know what they’ve been doin, oh no.
Oh Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin.

Well it’s only the dead that can live
But still I wrestle with this
To lose the pain that’s mine
Seventy times seven times
Cause Lord it doesn’t feel right
For me to turn a blind eye
Though I guess it’s not that much
When I think of what You’ve done.

This is love or this is hate…
We gotta a choice to make


Oh Father wont you forgive them
They don’t know what they’ve been doin’ , oh no
Oh Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin’

Why do we think that our hate’s gonna break a hard heart
We’re rippin arms over wars that don’t need to be fought
Cause pride wont let us lay our weapons on the ground
We build our bridges up but it’s just to burn them down
We think our pain is own apologies and get them to stop
Well truth be told it doesn’t matter if their sorry or not
Cause freedom comes when we surrender to the sound
Of Your mercy and Your grace, Father, send Your angels down

Oh Father wont you forgive them
They don’t know what they’ve been doin’
Oh Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin’
I feel like I’ve been losing

Oh Father wont you forgive them
They don’t know what they’ve been doin’
Oh Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin’
I feel like I’ve been losing

Oh Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin’

Community

My husband is a big OSU fan. So, a couple of years ago, we took our two boys to see the spring game. I vividly remember walking into the Ohio State Horseshoe. It was an amazing feeling. I wont lie to ya, my eyes teared up. Not because of my love for the game because my football knowledge doesnt come close to most. My tears were a result of the overwhelming sense of community. There werent just "people" everywhere....there were "FANS" everywhere. A sense of "we have a specific in common" saturated the Shoe. Smiles. Cheers. Greeters. Hot dogs. Scarlet and gray. Noise. Turf. Stained glass. Class. I will never forget it. My husband jokes that the Shoe is "church for football". I can see why that is said. I get the same feeling when I go to my church. I get the same feeling when I go to a school basketball game. An Amy Grant concert. When I see another mother struggling with trying to reason to her seven-year-old in Walmart. You find yourself in this place...with people whom you know or dont know....but the REASON you are there joins your lives together...even if it is just for a moment.

I love community on every level. I love being in the stands with the crowd. I love having a common thread with others that I dont even know. But my heart smiles when I look at the Team. The team has a depth of community. It is sacred. It is heart-warming. It is inspiring. Each person on the team is drawn to one another. There is a togetherness with the team. A sense of "whether we are on the sidelines or on the field we are in this game together". They have each other's backs....and for a season, they are as close as family.


I love community.
Jesus demonstrates community in a simple way.
He was on earth for everyone....
He associated with everyone He could get near....
He was real with everyone He came in contact with...
But he chose to do life with 12 guys.
They prayed together.
They travelled together.
They ate dinner together.
They fished together.
They ministered together.
They cried together.
They cared for others, together.
No wonder we are drawn more to some people than to others. Not to say that we are a clique...or to say that we are exclusive in who we hang out with....there is just a simple depth to our community. I have many friends....but there are few that I crave to be with. There are a handful that I have not seen in a decade, but I know that when I do see them again, we will pick up right where we left off. What a gift it is when you find those people. Thankful today for those hearts that God entrusts to me. Praying that I can be the person that they need me to be...the person that God wants me to be for them.

May we be aware of all levels of community in our lives...may we be Christs hands and feet to all we meet. May we feel the weight of the hearts that God entrusts to us. I love community!

Mollys first shopping trip :)

We took Molly to Pet Supplies Plus today. She got a bath, a new brush and some treats. It was such a good time. She is really a good dog. She nicely sat for her bath....and loved walking around the store allowing people to pet her. She also tried a few pet beds out. She found one she liked but she has to save $60 first though. Coen had a ball with her. Josh helped with the bath...then he went with daddy to get the oil changed in the van. Over all....great experience....we will totally go again :)

Tenth Avenue Concert

We are huge Tenth Avenue North fans! We were blessed to see them last weekend in Charleston with Casting Crowns. Great concert....great family time :)

Oh yeah....AND we met the band!! Thank you, Lord! And they are as great one on one as they are on stage. I love when bands are authentic who live what they preach! :)

AB, Coen and Josh running in races last weekend

Loving the sunshine

We had winter this year. I mean....we really saw snow. It was so neat. We got to play in the snow, enjoyed a few snow days off school, watched it blanket the yard and woods. It was beautiful. It was a great thing. But, I am so ready for the snow to go...and the sunshine to stay.

The last 5 days or so have been georgeous. Sun shining.....high 50's. Birds are chirping! Spring is right around the corner and I am glad :) Yesterday, I opened the curtains to see the sunshine come into the room. I cleaned the windows so nothing would hinder the beams of light from filling the room. It was great. I had more energy. I felt happy. Isnt it alot like when we experience Winter in our lives? In our hearts? I call it a "funk". We look around...we see the coldness....we are aware of the bitter moments....we cannot shake it. Then, after a season...it passes. Sun comes back into our lives chasing away the funk...and we are glad.

We really experienced winter this year....and because of that...Spring looks all the better. Thank You ,God, for allowing us to learn from the Winters in our lives...it helps us value the Spring all the more! Take that for what its worth to you today :)

Things I love # 22- I 28

Ok...so gotta finish this idea of things I love in honor of February. Because #22 I love to finish things. #23 I love my Day Planner #24 I love being task driven. #25 I love a clean house #26 I love quality time with friends #27 I love hearing my kids laugh #28 I love making AB smile.

This Februaru BLOG project was fun :) I am encaouraged to blog more often now. Hmmmm...wonder what my next blogging goal should be????

Josh is 7

Wanted to share some pic's of Josh's birthday party.
He had a great day with family and friends!

16-21 of the THINGS I love...

Ok...so I am a little catching up to do.

Focusing this month on things I love....

#16 I love vacation.

I love thinking about it. Watching Aaron plan for it with his spreadsheets :) I truly enjoy planning fun things for the kids during the trip. I always make goodie bags for the occaision. The boys totally look for these goodie bags now. As we drive out of the neighborhood...they are already wondering what is in the goodie bags!

Vacation. I love it. It is such a treat to get away from the every day rush and pause a little. And I like when I am allowed to pause.

#17

I love my mom. I am really missing her these days. I miss what might have been. I wish I could see her with my kids. I wonder what she would have done to celebrate Josh's birthday. I think of her often and see her in my kids. She was the best!!

#18

I love being a mom.

The hardest thing in my life...but the most rewarding. Hard...because it means so much. A mom is a comfort. A mom is safety. A mom is love. A mom is tough. A mom can smile. A mom can cry...but mostly, a mom is constant. A love that never dies. A mom makes you strong...

I love my boys. I get to be their mommy! Wow! God has entrusted these two precious lives to me. What pressure! :) What an honor! I pray that I can be all I need to be for them. Living by example. The catch is....some times I lead the correct way....and sometimes I do not. Sometimes I gotta say...."hey, I screwed up." I dont really like those times. I guess we all have those times. I know that God has a plan for them. Aaron and I are just assisting Him. And as much as I love them....I realize that God loves them more.

#19

Disney

I know that this is shallow...but Disney rocks! I have such fond memories of my family at Disney. What a fun place. I want to go back...and go back often!! I smile every time I think of our vacation there, summer 2008. I took tons of pictures. I will never forget how wonderful our family time was at Disney!!

#20

I love birthdays. Yesterday, Feb 20th, was Josh's birthday. He is seven! My baby boy is 7 years old. I love seeing him smile. It takes my breath away when he giggles and his eyes light up with joy. I hope that my kids are enjoying their childhood. Funny thing about childhood...you dont really appreciate it until you have grown beyond it....

#21

My bed.

I love my own bed. There is nothing like jumping in my bed when I am tired and snuggling up in the covers. My down comfortor and cool, soft sheets make me happy. Now, if I could just cure my insomnia and really get rest for once. Some day.

# 14 and #15 of February Things I love...

Things I love....

#14 flowers. I love flowers. I cannot wait to plant new plants this Spring. Crossing my fingers that my Hydrangea blooms THIS year. I love watering them....cutting them and placing them all over the house. "Miracle Grow" Tuesday is something to look forward to this year. (it is the day of the week when I remember to add miracle grow to the flowers....idea created by my neighbor and sister-flower-lover, Lindy)

#15 A clean house. Isnt it the best feeling ever when your home is reallllllly clean? I hope to have that happen....TOMORROW :)

Ok...so I have some catching up to do:
10-13....Im not too far off task :)

(continued from below...."Things I love".... See 1-9 below)

Things I love:

#10 Panera Soy Caramel Latte's - nuff said.


#11 Good lyrics. I love when a song speaks to me right where I am. I mean, really....isnt that an amazing thing? Great cd's to listen to.....Tenth Avenue North. EVERY song on tha CD is a devotion. I like to get in the van (the sporty, cool, mini-van) and turn a song up realllllly loud. Surrounded my music. I love being there!!

Amy Grant - Yes, she taught me to sing into my hairbrush at the age of 5. I am forever indebted to her...she inspired me to love music...to celebrate REAL life in the moment.

Toby Mac....Bebo Norman....etc



#12 Naps. I love a good power nap.


#13 Productive Ministry Meetings with my friends. I am energized by ministry planning. I love it. Today, I got to hang with some wonderful people who love Jesus....and love the thought of connecting others to Jesus. What a wonderful start to the day!

continued from "things I love". see 1-8 below :)

I love

#9

Today is February 9, 2010. So that means I am on task as of NOW :)...since I am writing about #9.

Today I want to be thankful for a warm home. I am grateful. As I ran some errands today in the cold, snowy, wet weather...it was refreshing to come up the hill and see my house. I knew that I was almost home....in the warmth....in the comfort of my own home. There is no where quite like home. No where. It used to exist for me outside this house. Before mom died. I still dream about what it would be like to pack up my kids (whom she never met) and take them along with Aaron and sweet Molly to see my mom and dad for the weekend. What would she do with them? What would she bake? What toy or outfit would she have bought them while she was away from them? Would she be louder than they would be when they first saw each other?? They say "you cant miss what you didnt have"...but, I do.

I am grateful that I have a house...and I am even more grateful that it is a HOME. Candles burning...something baking...bubble baths, bleach, laundry, crockpots, iced tea, warm tea, a broken dishwasher, wooden floors, painted walls, the stocked fridge, tableclothes, messy cabinets, the sound of the boys wrestling in the other room, toys on the floor. It is home. Good and bad...messy and clean...it is still home.

I want to preserve "home" for my kids. I want to always have "home" waiting for them each day....even when it is loud and grumpy. :) Still....it is "home".

I want to live long enough for them to bring their kids to me and Aaron. For us to be louder than they are when they arrive. I want to give them that gift :)

Home.

A place.

A feeling.

A blessing.

A gift.

I am so grateful for HOME.

I love...

#8

I love the seasons. I am totally in favor of each season having its own time. I mean, that is even Biblical, isnt it? (Eccles. 3:1)

I love how the snow is nestled in the woods right now. How the snow rests on the evergreens. Even the bare trees look beautiful. Seasons remind me that things change...that renewal happens. There is a sense of stillness in winter time. Is in almost like nature is in awe of God's extreme presence. It is captivating.

I love....#7

I love....

#7 - I love A Reason To Cook. Cooking with purpose is a favorite thing of mine. Cooking for a family event...a holiday...a special day...friends...is so fun for me. I love planning the menu and being with everyone. It is so thrilling to find that special recipe too. My favorite recent one: Lemon Pasta (A Barefoot Contessa recipe shared with me from my dear friend, Kelly.) It is amazzzzzzzing!

See my February Blogs (Dwelling on the things I love 1-6) below:

So, I am reading my friends blog (Kelly, "The Feathered Nest") and I see that she is inspired to spend the month of February dwelling on things we love. I too, must join in! I am 6 "days late to this party" sooooo here goes....my first 6 and then, I will try to keep on task for the month :)


I love:


#1 My real God. I am so thankful that God loves me. A real love. I am thankful that He is for me...and that I dont have to be afraid of Him, but I can embrace Him as my biggest fan. He loves me unconditionally to the extent that I need NO words to explain myself to Him. Grace is wonderful. His love is overwhelming.



#2 My family. God gave me the best husband in the world. I am serious. I totally won. He is amazing in how he loves me and our boys. I want to be the wife that God wants him to have. My boys challange me to truly BE the person that God wants me to be. Every move I make influences them. No pressure there! :P



#3 My Goldendoodle. Molly is God-sent. Another reminder of how God loves me and cares about the details of my life. She is SUCH a gift!!




#4 My laptop. Ok. I know that I am not being deep here....but I love the fact that I can connect with others in a click of a mouse :)




#5 My friends. And NO...these are in NO particular order...for those friends that are reading. It is just what is coming to mind at the moment. Where was I? Oh...friends. I am so blessed with AMAZING friends who love me. God has placed blessings in my life...and I am in awe. I get to "do life" with great, genuine people.



#6 Music. It connects my soul to God. It connects my soul to the moment....the memory... What a gift music is to my heart!



Ok...so there are my first 6 ...to catch up with the date 2-6-2010. This will be a great thing to do for me....to remind me of what is GOOD in my life. We all need a reminder sometimes, huh?

Molly Doodle sporting her cool hair due!